Getting in Touch in Tamarindo....
|Photo by Jesse Epstein
Well, have been at the beach for a little over a month. You maybe wondering how we are doing? I have been posting pics to keep you all in the loop. I love it here, but everything is adjustment even in paradise.
It's been a little over 2 years since we moved from New York City. We had been living in the mountains and if you have been reading my blog, you know that I have a blood condition called Thalassemia trait. My red blood cells are a weird shape so don't hold oxygen as long as someone without this disorder. So breathing was an issue and I became very anemic. The anemia made my immune system weak and I kept getting sick.
After being at the beach (sea level!) a week or so, I could feel that my body wasn't working so hard to breathe. Yes, I felt relieved but also exhausted from the past 2yrs of living with less oxygen in my body.
I hurt my back before we moved and it only got worse after the move. I kept doing stretches but still not feeling so great. I decided to take myself to get a massage. It's been about 3yrs since I had a one.
If you want to get really present to your body, have a massage. I had a deep tissue massage that was exactly what I needed. With every touch I could feel all the exhaustion caused by my body's effort to breathe. Something else showed up for me by the end: how I easily let the mind-body connection go. Since we moved from the States, I have been mostly in my head. Hard to exercise when you can't breathe.
Walking back to our condo, I really felt bad about how I let myself be so disconnected from my body. Now, since I've been sick so much physically, I thought that wouldn't happen. Not so. after awhile I just got tired of being sick and tired of being tired. I was angry at my body for having a blood condition and for getting sick repeatedly. It made me feel like a bad mother.
Seeing how cruel I have been with my body, I literally sat down and had a serious conversation with my warrior women body and apologized for not appreciating what it's been through and thanking it for holding up very well considering the circumstances. I also have forgiven myself for moving without thinking to a mountain area instead of the beach at sea level, where I can breathe. Especially when the beach is where I wanted to be the whole time anyway!
Right now Myah and I am starting a private yoga class on the beach. Walking and running a little bit more. Working up to that because of my back. Eating well and have an appointment to talk to my Acupuncturist in NYC to get my immune system back on track.
As a Mental Health Care Advocate, I also promote self care. Actually every person needs to practice self care. It's not always perfect but let me tell you this, there was a time when self care wasn't even in my vocabulary.
Love and honor your body-mind connection because it's real. Love yourself because God does!
Love and Peace!