Anxiety Strikes Again!
Today, I am feeling very anxious.
It seems that having so many irons in the fire at once make the anxiety more intense. If that is possible. Everything that is happening isn't really anything terrible...it's just that many things are happening at once.
Yesterday I let myself be very vulnerable. I wish I could say I do that more, but when you move to a new place, putting yourself out there can be scary. Opening yourself up to new people and surroundings is a good thing! I am glad I spontaneously went out last evening with new friends. It was really a lot of fun! I felt like the old me. In NYC, I was always out and meeting new people. It's just been a long time, thats all.
I also wrote an apology for something about something I did that I don't feel good about. It's always hard to admit to things you don't like about yourself. This person means a lot to me. Along with my apology to this person, I had to point out some actions towards me that hurt my feelings and how disrespected I felt.Who knows if this person will write back and if it will be filled with anger like the last communication I received?
A lot of things are up in the air with selling our house in Escazu. Lately, I've been good about handing everything over to God on this situation. Well, I'm not doing so well today with that.
Anxiety can be very crippling. The desire to work on my business today isn't there. I know it has to do with my basic fear of being successful. Plus all the other stuff I mentioned above combined with the daily anxiety of this new business doesn't help.
Right now I don't feel like doing anything. Considering going to the pool or walking to the beach but right now that feels even too much.
Maybe I will just reach out to a friend or pray for awhile. I will eventually do something, because I can't stand being in my skin when I get like this. Journaling just popped in my head and that is always a good thing....
Love and Peace!